It's easy to get lost in the everyday trials that sabotage some unions. But there are many couples who overcome those challenges and perhaps hurdle an even greater obstacle--long-distance love.
Visits, e-mails and telephone calls sustain these couples who admit they sacrifice some physical closeness. But they say what they gain means just as much:
Faith. Strength that they can foil any odds. In these relationships, they say, there's no time to obsess about pettiness. Instead, you practice a different mantra: Make each second count.
There are days when they're lonely. There are moments when they long for a touch instead of a call. Still, their bond endures. Whether separated by an ocean or an outlook, the shortest distance between two hearts, they say, is love.
Among them are people like Courtland Bivens III, who drives from Alabama each weekend to see his wife Regina Lynch Hudson in Atlanta.
Dr. Charles and Beverly Alston, who bridge the distance between Chicago and Phoenix; Stephanie Murphy and James Toussaint, who travel from Columbus, Ohio, to Dallas.
Think that's far?
Consider the trans-Atlantic commute of lifemates Felicia Mabuza-Suttle and her husband Earl Suttle. They journey back and forth, a distance of 8,421 miles, between Atlanta and Johannesburg, South Africa.
The two met in Minneapolis in the early 1970s while Felicia was an exchange student and Earl was a counselor for the Milwaukee school system.
They married in 1976.
What grounds the Suttles, according to Earl, "old-fashioned family values.
We're faithful and committed to each other. That core value is very important to us ...
We steer clear of negaholics. We see these as below-the-line thinking people. Instead, we focus on our family goals; and that is Felicia and I want to spend the rest of our lives together.
"
But what about the downside?
Both make three costly trans-Atlantic trips each year; then there are the phone bills that average $1000 a month. Sandwiched between the flights and calls have been short tempers and bouts with depression and loneliness.
"I've thought about ending this relationship a few times," Earl admits. "I get around my toxic friends who ask, `Earl, why do you continue to do this? There are a lot of beautiful, single ladies in Atlanta.'
He says, "All I know is Felicia is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with--and that's enough to keep me going."
